forgive them god - for being so blind that they can't see what's inside
Surprisingly, the fact that I've lost 4 kilos in some months has been totally invisible for some of my licker teachers. Fuck. Absolutely fuck.
I'm currently..
> Having a big passion over moccasin shoes. They're just too adorable.
> Forcing myself to stop being lazy to do prayers. I actually have been ignoring it for too long. I'm starting to be afraid.
And actually today is our 20th monthversarry. But what's so special?
Maybe I'm not really in the mood for blogging today. It just.. 'whoosh'ed - evaporating.
I want my own Glenn Fredly to sing me a lullaby.
~ Pictures, pictures, pictures of the day.. ~
oh c'mon people, what's so hard about filling this up?
- synta @ 2006-02-24 / 5:03 p.m.
tomorrow the day will start, and i'll love you more
So you wanna know what the big news is?
Thrilled to see..
This?
Actually this isn't really something new, I've been wearing the braces on the mandible for about two weeks. I decided not to tell you guys yet because it's hardly noticeable. Now that it's completely glued inside my mouth, here I am proudly publishing it. I loove braces! :D
The exam for today turned out really shitty. I always loved Math, and I thought I would never hate Math again after I finished my tenth grade - since my teacher was so intimidating in many ways. But now I think I was kidding myself all the time knowing that Math isn't really that.. loveable.
Blah. I am a loser. Now I'm getting more and more sure about it.
And why haven't you filled this up yet?
- synta @ 2006-02-20 / 7:58 p.m.
say it now louder; "fu*k"
Okay, so getting over this nonsense - absolutely stupid - syndrome turned out not really easy. Especially when you happen to be in it more often than the times you are able to avoid it. I am so darn confuse. At a time I want so bad to forget this but on the other hand.. Damn.
My mind’s stacked on this!
I'd better runaway from this by starting ramble over my Math's module.
- synta @ 2006-02-19 / 9:11 a.m.
falling or not falling - it's a choice
Hey people..
Do me a favor to let me know myself better, will you?
So, I'm late for BTA's first class. And I'm happy to hear that! X]
Anyway, the thing I typed on my last post - about someone had replaced 'HE' - I think all I have to do about it is just.. Well, ignoring it. I read my unpublished written journal last night, and there's one writing amused me.
It says something like.. I've been in this condition for more than twice. I've broken more than two relationships I've fought to have by falling in love to someone another. And by being there once again, now I'm sure that this is just an unusual phase I gotta step out from. This is just a syndrome. A 'long-term-relationship syndrome'.
The thing that I should be more concern of, is I love him. And more than that, I think he's the one. And I don't want to lose him just for some shallow reason. I gotta remember what Deeta said once : "Inget Sin, lo dapetin Acil susah."
I have to take a bath now. BTA's second class is on 10.00.. Or so.
- synta @ 2006-02-18 / 8:44 a.m.
i can't deny i still feel something
Do you blame someone for falling in love to some not-so-good-looking guy who doesn't have any passion for fashion and always laughs like a cow?
I don't.
Anyway,
Yesterday I was being the dumbest moron in the history of human living. And come to think about it more, I think this is all caused by this horrifying exam week.
Can you believe I totally forgot having any meal until dinner because I was too busy understanding hundreds of PHYSICS FORMULAS?
No breakfast, no lunch, no brunch, no snacks. NOTHING!
I really should pay more attention to my health because I think feeling nothing's wrong while the truth was your digestion is clearly empty isn't really a healthy life to live. Maybe I could try starting by stop studying Physics? It would doubtlessly be the best starting point.
Oh well, remember the one I mentioned on some posts ago? Yes, the one I refer as 'he' on a sentence that sounds: "HE's back". I think he doesn't have the same damaging effect as the one he used to have one to two years ago. He's safe now. He's done. He's over. I got over him.
I know, I know.. finally.
..
But I think I kinda.. found someone to replace that missing position.
Bad, bad me. *punching*
- synta @ 2006-02-17 / 1:28 p.m.
what is so nice about living things?
This is so fuckin tiring. I've never had any passion in studying Biology, therefore I always thanked God for this whole KBK things which had let me forget anything I consider unessential and just sort of getting my brain's space smaller and smaller.
That's the ONLY reason I could complete tenth and eleventh grade at the first place! If I had to take any Biology's final semester tests which made me have to re-study all materials I had on that semester, I would have been announced dead by studying too much living things.
I think I won't pass this subject.
Another free pass to the remedial test after I ruined Chem this morning.
Damn damn damn.
- synta @ 2006-02-13 / 10:40 p.m.
surprising surprises are no more interesting
I decided to sign myself up to the 'Ujian Saringan Masuk ITB di Daerah', which by the way, would be held at my school. And I'm planning on choosing some high-qualification majors in design faculty. This is useless, I guess. But I won't resist any chance that's coming on to me. We'll never know 'til we have tried, won't we?
I'll be having my first exam week for this semester next Monday. Can you believe it? It's just 3 days left from now. Should I say 'horay' and cheerleading others now?
Someone told me that I currently have two admirers. They should be my secret admirers until they revealed their feelings to someone I know and since this someone hardly could keep any secrets, well, now I know. :D I just can't imagine how I would act when I meet them because of course I don't want my fans to look me in some messy ways. Hahah. Keep it off the record, but this is the first time I found out someone has a crush on me since the day I promised myself to be devoted to my beloved one only. This is amazing - I'm telling you.
And..
He's back.
*sigh*
This is the hardest. I have to fight this. No stepping backwards. No more falling for him. I have to control my f*ckin uncontrollable feelings. I HAVE TO.
- synta @ 2006-02-10 / 9:08 p.m.
did i break the world's record? ;p
I can sleep peacefully tonight - at last.. ^^
- synta @ 2006-02-05 / 11:06 p.m.
feeling like a fool cause i've let me down
B
B
Q
Night at Bintang Merah last Monday.
The self-made burnt chicken was awesome! :D
So, I fell sick again for the hundredth time since I entered this bloody school. I've never been this fragile before, not even when I was called as newbie at my jr. HS. I think this school really should start thinking about the sake of its students' level of insanity. And then, start rebuilding the curriculum all over again.
ITB's Grand Admission Test would be held within few more weeks, and I'm still not sure about my options. What would I write as my first, second, and third choices?
Options:
- Product Design
I don't really think my drawing is qualified enough. Darn darn darn I want this major so bad. And it's getting more and more obsessing. :(
- Architecture
I don't think my 'MIPA' skills would be qualified enough. They say it's the worst part.
- Visual Communication Design
No thanks, I want to be a collegian next year, not another Bintang Merah's so-called veteran.
:(
Oh anyway, my Bintang Merah's teacher is reading this blog.
"Halo Mas Agees!" *wave*
On a lighter note, I've lost approximately 4 kilograms during this academic year. That's how depressed I've been.
- synta @ 2006-02-03 / 3:13 p.m.
